From An Awakened Eye

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Day Dreaming

Today has been a very busy day at work and I just can't keep my focus. It is so beautiful outside and I just want to go lay out by the pool and read a book!  {but} I am stuck here scheduling procedures and answering phone calls. Thank God J was off today. He helped me chill for lunch by bringing me my favorite... Chick fil a sweet tea! And of course the chicken sand and waffle fries.  He is so good to me.  I just looked at him and said well, 17 disappointments and let downs. He just smiled and said, "not this month either huh?". I just sat there in a peace and looked at him then said, "I will just be so glad when we are finally pregnant." He kinda chuckled and said "well I won't" and chuckled because he says that I will be the grumpiest pregnant women there is. I asked him if he thought I would be a "bridezilla"? and he said that he didn't think about it. I know I did... I was afraid of how I would react to that kind of pressure, but it was just the opposite of what I thought. I was the most calm and loving person that day. I just enjoyed the moment I had waited 7 years to experience. I told him that I thought a pregnancy would be the same way for me. Now I know there are incredible hormones involved, but I will be so grateful to be puking over a toilet, leg cramps and back aches that it may be different than we think. 
 As we finished the conversation I pointed across the parking lot and said "see what I see every day?" He said "what?" And as we waited he saw 2 teenage girls get out of a car one already had a 2 year old and several months along and the other girl was about to pop. He just sat there and looked at me like, "baby it will happen."  I told him that normally it discourages me, but not today! I choose to hold my chin up knowing God has a perfect plan and it is just going to take a little longer to get there than I wished or even prayed a thousand times over.
  I just have a hopeful spirit today although I know this isn't the "month". I'm OK with that. Partly because I don't think we could squeeze another Feb. birthday into the family calendar! lol.  So we will see if March will be the magical month.  Yeah I think like this every month. I can calculate it up faster than you can blink.
 So with my chin up and hopeful I bought this cute dress...
yes, that is a baby bump dress.
It was on serious sale at Old Navy and it had rave reviews for before during and after pregnancy. So I can enjoy it now and then!  We shall see... hoping for a good MD appt on Friday with a positive game plan.


Abundance is... lunch with my hubby, spending time with church family tonight, clean sheets on a comfy bed.

3 comments:

  1. Our struggles are different but our God is the same, and I KNOW He is good. I KNOW He hasn't forgotten you. I KNOW His plan is only to give us His best. Everytime.

    Praying for you and inspired by your hope and faith.

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  2. I'm so excited to see what God is doing in your life. You are probably one of the most amazing women I know. Love you! I'm praying for you and I know God is working! HE is faithful and good.

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  3. Thanks ladies! Your support and encouraging words are amazing for me. You will never know how much they mean to me. He has a plan and He is so faithful!

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